Morgane Oléron
My name is Victoria. I am 46 years old, and for the past sixteen years, I have been both an employer and an employee.
I am one of the people you would describe as growth-minded, ambitious, and always-on workaholic. I thought I knew how to manage work, stress, and responsibility, as I have always been into spiritual wellness and a sense of balance. But awareness alone was not enough.
Burnout is sneaky, and its beginning is almost impossible to notice.
Before the pandemic, I balanced my hard work with long workations in relaxed environments abroad.
But since then, I stopped taking long trips, which had previously been a lifeline for my mental health. Major life events compounded the pressure.
The geopolitical events, anxiety in society, unprecedented stress levels from clients, and a string of unexpected project failures built up inside me. My mental health became gradually weaker, and energy vaporated from my body. So did my self-confidence, even if it was not noticed from the outside.
I experienced burnout in phases, which can be described in five stages:
My first phase started with a new, highly exciting project together with a newly discovered business partner.
I was passionate, ambitious, and eager. The work was absorbing, and I dove in headfirst. Days stretched to twelve hours, meetings piled up, work trips became constant, and emails and messages never ended.
At first, it felt like energy and purpose, but soon I noticed a critical moment approaching. Being aware of the dangers, I could feel that if I did not act, things would get worse. But I failed to hit the brakes in time.
I pulled back from the project to save myself, which left me restarting everything alone with no time to recover.
I plunged into full speed again. I rebuilt a client base, took on new projects on my own terms, and managed everything.
Life added more pressure: we had moved to a new country. One child was finishing school in a foreign language and needed extended mental attention. Another needed two exhausting daily commutes. I started to experience dizziness, balance issues, overwhelming fatigue, emotional passivity, and loss of patience with work and family.
Clients became unhappy, my perfectionism intensified, so I pushed even harder.
Time for pleasure and rest disappeared. I was always on. Even basic tasks became mechanized. Instead of grocery shopping, I organized meal kits delivered to my door, all shopping was online, and meetings were over Zoom. Social interaction vanished completely. Everything was work and everyday tasks.
Eventually, all I wanted was rest, but I felt that I could not take it. I decided to press on. This decision came to cost me a year of my life, devastating financial losses, and debts.
The breaking point came about 11 months ago, when a long-prepared project was canceled overnight.
Within a week, my cognitive abilities deteriorated. I had daily panic attacks, balance problems, and social anxiety. My ability to communicate, plan, and think creatively collapsed completely. I could no longer assign tasks or guide my employees.
Over the following months, my whole life fell apart.
I became completely mentally incapacitated, lost my company, my home, my business partners, my friends, and my faith in myself. People around me could not understand the state I was in and thought I was being irresponsible, and those who did understand found it too burdensome.
So I did what many other burnouts do - started to isolate myself, as continuously explaining myself with no results was too devastating.
Looking back, my burnout was a slow, cumulative process. My constant, always-on state, my neglect of recovery, and my inability to stop and assess led to total collapse.
I experienced phases one, two, and three, and reached phase four, total inability to function professionally and personally.
If I could go back, I would act and live very differently.
I now understand the importance of paying attention to early warning signals. Fatigue, distraction, decision-making difficulties, and irritability are serious symptoms that cannot be ignored. I protect my recovery time as seriously as I protect work.
Back then, I did notice the burnout signals, but honestly, I had no idea what severe burnout even feels like and what it can do to one’s life.
I imagined that burnout was just about feeling exhausted - and it is, until a certain point - but not realizing the severe mental and cognitive deterioration it brings when things are going too far.
I do not let the lessons learned go to waste.
It took me almost a year to regain my cognitive abilities and a stable mental presence. I am happy to be back in the workforce again, but with strict standards.
First of all, to make life worth living, I apply lessons from books like The Fun Habit by Mike Rucker, Ph.D. From his book, I learned how small moments of joy can affect our daily functioning.
I read books on paper, replace doomscrolling with walks outside, and swap mindless Netflix for regular outings with my kids.
This change has brought much more calmness and silence to my life. My head is clearer, the thoughts I think are mine, and the chaos that screens exposed me to has disappeared from my life.
I moved through problems like a tank because it had always brought success.
But then I was younger, I had fewer serious responsibilities and more energy, and like many of us, I had less noise in my head.
Now, I carried not only my own responsibilities but also the burdens of business partners, employees, family, and strangers who reached out to me through my smartphone.
My boundaries were weak, I didn’t take my mental health seriously enough, and I did not uphold my standards.
I didn’t know better.
Burnout can be invisible, especially in the early phases.
In the early phase, a person might complain of fatigue or test boundary-setting, only to break them repeatedly.
By phase three, the signs are clearer. Attention wanes, work slows, mistakes appear in areas that were previously flawless. Memory lapses occur, and individuals may repeat themselves or forget tasks.
Close colleagues might notice the change and feel confused, asking if the person is ok. Usually, the answer is yes, as the person in question has no idea what is happening.
They produce more work but with lower results.
Emotional signs include impatience, mild cynicism toward colleagues or clients, loss of inspiration, and diminished initiative. Active engagement is replaced with passivity and mechanical behavior.
What leaders often miss is that high performers hide burnout the longest. Their work may appear normal until a sudden mental or physical collapse occurs. They feel guilt, shame, and intense internal confusion as they are losing their identity as people who can master it all.
What helps is regular conversations that go beyond metrics, where employees feel heard and safe to open up.
Behavioral patterns, not isolated incidents, should be observed. One day may seem fine. The next day, the person finds themselves in total lack of energy. Leaders must create a culture where communication about struggles is safe and encouraged.
Burnout affects more than the individual.
Burnout costs companies money long before it becomes visible.
Those most at risk include employees in high-responsibility roles, independent workers, perfectionists, and those in chaotic or high-pressure environments. Remote and isolated workers, parents with small children or a family member with special needs, or anyone carrying guilt, are particularly vulnerable.
A common pattern is that the most responsible employees are least likely to seek help. That is why prevention is essential.
Organizations must prepare for burnout as it is spreading like an epidemic.
Here are my five cents for the most important intervention:
Burnout is a complex situation, and it can show differently from person to person. Organizations save tremendously by investing in well-prepared HRs who ensure that employees feel heard and supported.
Like with many other mental challenges, the feeling of not being understood and even worse - made to feel guilty - is a straight road downhill. Being heard makes the (almost) burned-out person feel hope and increases trust towards the company they are working for.
Mental health support must be easily accessible, including therapy, coaching, and wellbeing tools.
No employee should be excluded from getting help due to the high cost they face when seeking help outside of the workplace.
Burned-out people suffer from anxiety, indecision, and lack of energy, so getting help should be a smooth and fast process with practical, personal support.
Clear work process guidelines, capacity-focused conversations, and regular, attentive check-ins help prevent burnout.
Employees must feel listened to in practice, not just words.
It is extremely important. Don’t make the employees explain themselves over and over - it is draining and humiliating their burned-out brains; explaining once should be enough. A culture where expressing mental struggles is normal and safe is vital.
Feeling understood and supported shortens the path to recovery.
Leaders must take early signals seriously.
They must normalize mental health discussions, monitor capacity and output, and foster psychological safety. They must model boundary-setting, recovery, and realistic expectations.
Preventing burnout is a leadership responsibility, not a burden employees should carry alone.
The bottom line is, burnout is an extremely sensitive mental state where the person must be looked into their eyes, and given the feeling that they are supported.
Burnout is a signal, a warning that our systems, priorities, and boundaries need urgent attention.
Recovery is possible, but it requires awareness, intentional choices, and a willingness to act differently than before. And it requires external help.
I have learned that protecting energy, setting clear standards, and asking for support are acts of strength.
For leaders, recognizing burnout early, creating safe spaces, and modeling healthy boundaries is not optional. It is the foundation for sustainable success, trust, and human connection.
Ultimately, burnout taught me the importance of listening to myself, valuing my limits, and building a life where balance, joy, and growth are not negotiable.
It is a painful lesson, but one that reshapes the way we work, live, and lead.
“The Trauma of Burnout” by Dr. Claire Plumly
About the author
Psychology Content Writer at Siffi
Morgane crafts compassionate, engaging content that makes mental health conversations more human and accessible. At Siffi, she combines storytelling with strategy to foster a culture of care and connection in the workplace.
Recent Posts